The sublime, I think, is a feeling only found without language.
Freedom begins without language, like that Wallace Stevens poem: It was how the sun came shining into his room: To be without a description of to be.
A little before 4 o’clock this afternoon, I left my studio after a full day’s work, and went for a walk in the park down the street. I had to get out of the house and see the sun. I walked past the jogging trails and all the typical swimming holes.
I walked about 20-30 minutes in, down a thickly grown trail. And off the trail, I found a small offshoot which took me down to the water. The offshoot cut through tall grasses and flowers built up around the creek’s edge. It was narrow, just wide enough for single file, and the grasses grew as tall as me. By the water, there was a narrow opening cut through the brush, so there was direct access.
I felt bold, and really wanted to feel apart of the landscape around me: the sun was bright, the sky a rich color of blue, , the simple sounds of frogs and the wind, and the grasses danced with the blow. I stripped down and went skinny-dipping. I could hear other swimmers down the creek, their voices echoing of the rock walls around the water. I knew they were there, but they knew nothing of me. A sharp bend in the river, thickly grown along the banks, and the swimmers 60 yards down stream had no idea I was there. I swam naked for about another 20-30 minutes, absorbing the sun and the water, exhilarated to be.
A tall tree had fallen down along the bank, and stretched half way across the stream. It was grown over with algae and other plant life. I watched fish swimming around its branches.
I felt so alive, more so than I can remember being for quite sometime, or perhaps even for the first time. I was a part of the world: It was everything being more real, himself/At the centre of reality, seeing it. It was profound and soothing, like a baptism or a rebirth. I was the world.
My family left town recently, the wife and kids, and I am alone for over two weeks. I think of it like a residency, alone with my work 24-7. I feel full of creative energy.